Mean boss? Here's how to deal with a difficult or toxic manager: Ask HR

Johnny C. Taylor Jr. tackles your human resources questions as part of a series for USA TODAY. Taylor is president and CEO of the Society for Human Resource Management, the world's largest HR professional society and author of "Reset: A Leader’s Guide to Work in an Age of Upheaval.”

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Question: One of the shift supervisors on our engineering services team is often extremely harsh when critiquing workers. One of my co-workers even quit because of his behavior, and I feel stressed when I have to work with him. Should I approach him or upper management about this behavior? – Avril

Answer: Disrespectful and demeaning behavior can cause stress and take a toll on your mental and physical health and work performance. If you feel comfortable, address the situation directly with the shift supervisor should the behavior create tension for you and other team members. If you don't feel comfortable meeting with the supervisor, report the situation to Human Resources. The first step is to document the occurrences of this behavior. Gather the specifics of the incidents – dates, times, the specific language your supervisor used, and any witnesses.

If you choose to speak directly to the shift supervisor, schedule a meeting to discuss how the behavior is affecting you. Be professional and constructive during the conversation. Avoid sounding accusatory by using "I" phrases such as "I feel stressed when…." This focuses the discussion on the impact and helps yield a more positive resolution. If the supervisor's behavior continues or you don't feel comfortable speaking to them directly, reach out to HR and provide your collected documentation. Be prepared to address the business impact the behavior is causing like reduced productivity, absenteeism and turnover. Additionally, review company policies on workplace conduct and procedures for filing a complaint.

I want to emphasize how essential it is to alert HR to what is going on in the workplace. HR can't be everywhere or see everything. It is incumbent on workers to take an active role in protecting the work environment. Conversely, employers should understand how workplace toxicity impacts workplace morale, productivity, and, most important, profitability.

Supervisors often struggle with providing feedback appropriately, or they may not be aware of the impact their feedback delivery is having. Taking action can be intimidating, but the behavior will continue if the supervisor, management, or HR is unaware, resulting in a toxic workplace for you and others.

While I am not privy to all the details of your work environment, I expect your management team and HR to value and protect the workplace and work performance. However, if this behavior continues unchecked, you should take steps to protect your well-being, even if it means seeking opportunities elsewhere.

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I have to take leave to respond to a subpoena in another state. Can my employer require that I use PTO during my absence? – Moritz

Your employer may require you to use accrued paid time off to respond to a subpoena if you take off work. However, it depends on applicable state regulations. Some states, like Virginia, prohibit employers from requiring employees to use their PTO to cover absences related to court appearances. Also, many states prohibit employers from making adverse employment decisions for employees needing to respond to a subpoena.

Start by reviewing your state regulations to see if this is a prohibited practice. Then review your company's policy, which should offer guidelines on using PTO. You should also check for an option to use unpaid or witness leave instead of using PTO to respond to a subpoena. If not, you will likely need to adhere to company policy and use PTO for this absence. If you are unclear on the leave options available through your employer, discuss your situation with your Human Resources Team for further guidance.

Once you understand what regulations and policies apply, you can choose how to fulfill your legal obligation. I hope all goes well.